Via Brain Trust: 93 Top Scientists Reveal Lab-Tested Secrets to Surfing, Dating, Dieting, Gambling, Growing Man-Eating Plants, and More!
Via Quirkology: How We Discover the Big Truths in Small Things.
In a study by Richard Wiseman, less than 9% of couples that talked movies wanted a second date vs 18% of couples that talked about travel.
Emotional, personal information exchange during first date conversation promotes powerful feelings of connection.
Via Sam Gosling’s book, Snoop: What Your Stuff Says About You: Arthur Aron, a psychologist at the State University of New York at Stony Brook, is interested in how people form romantic relationships, and he’s come up with an ingenious way of taking men and women who have never met before and making them feel close to one another. Instead of talking about the World Cup or their favorite desserts, they shared their innermost fears or told the story of losing their virginity.
Here's how it works: One person holds an object in their hand which symbolizes that he or she has the floor.
While one person has the floor, the other person can only listen by repeating back or paraphrasing what the other person said.
The listener can stop the speaker if s/he is saying too much for the listener to repeat back.
When couples use this technique, it automatically ensures that each person will be able to say everything s/he needs to say without interruption, rebuttals, criticism or attack.
The intensity of the dialogue partners’ bond at the end of the forty-five-minute vulnerability interaction was rated as closer than the closest relationship in the lives of 30 percent of similar students. Via Dan Ariely: We limited the type of discussions that online daters could engage in by eliminating their ability to ask anything that they wanted and giving them a preset list of questions and allowing them to ask only these questions. No matter their gender or orientation, beer-lovers are 60% more likely to be okay with sleeping with someone they’ve just met.
In other words, the instant connections were more powerful than many long-term, even lifelong relationships. The questions we chose had nothing to do with the weather and how many brothers and sisters they have, and instead all the questions were interesting and personally revealing (ie., “how many romantic partners did you have? Sadly, this is the only question with a meaningful correlation for women.
Finally he would wander into the kitchen and mutter something to his wife, for example, "Let’s eat fast so we can get to the PTA meeting! Here are some rituals you and your spouse should consider working on: • Daily e-mailing each other with a compliment. (especially important for husbands to do) • Anniversaries deserve special attention.